Laurie Idahosa who is married to late Archbishop Benson Idahosa's
first son, Feb Idahosa, shared her amazing journey to becoming a mother
of 3 boys after many years of trying and several failed IVF's. Laurie
shared how God gave her a son exactly one year after she buried her
first child who died just after
12 hours after she gave birth to him. She shared her experience on her
website Laurieidahosa.com to celebrate mother's day today. Amazing testimony. Read below after the cut..
The
Western world celebrates today as Mothers Day. This is one day on the
calendar that I used to dread. I'd see children kissing their moms,
celebrating... and all I could think about was how I so desperately
wanted to become a mother myself. I remember many past Mothers Days when
I would shed tears because the deep longing in my heart to become a
mother seemed to be up against insurmountable odds. Today, my story has
changed. Allow me to share my miracle story with you.
My
husband, F.E.Benson Idahosa II, and I met in Benin City, Nigeria when I
was 13 years old; our fathers (Archbishop Benson Idahosa and Gary
Whetstone) were friends. I’ve referred to my love for Feb as “love at
first sight” because very soon after we met, the sparks of love began to
flicker between us.
After
many years, my dream came true when I was 28 years old; Feb made me his
wife! I was the happiest woman on earth and smiled ear to ear all
through our courtship and wedding day. I was so excited to be his wife!
The next thing I couldn’t wait for was to be the mother of his children;
I wanted so badly to carry his baby.
During
the first year of our marriage, pregnancy didn’t happen like I
expected. Subsequently, I convinced my husband to go with me for a
fertility check-up. He thought it was silly because he was so sure that
we’d have our kids. Eventually, just to pacify me, we went for the
check-up.
To
our surprise, they did all the testing and came back to us with
tormenting news. They told us that both he and I had very serious
fertility issues and that we would never be able to have a child without
In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF). The doctor looked at us both in our eyes
and told us that we were 99.9% infertile.
My
world felt like it crashed down on me. It was a journey I never
expected to undergo. My husband on the other hand had steadfast faith
and kept reassuring me, saying, “We will have our children! God promised
it, He will do it!”
Following
the logical path of thinking, we decided to embark on the journey of
IVF. The next year, we gathered our money together from some investments
we made before marriage and went for our first treatment. After
$25,000, injections, surgery and so many stories that ought not to be
told, we did our first embryo transfer. 2 weeks later, so full of hope, we went back to see if we were pregnant and my world crashed again; it didn’t work!
We repeated this process several times over the next few years, each time ending in disappointment.
The
more treatments I did, the puffier my tummy began to look. Well-meaning
friends and family would see me and think that finally I was expectant!
They would rub my tummy and give me hugs of congratulations… all the
while, I knew my uterus was empty. Empty! And trust me, I sooo longed
for a baby.
After
four failed IVF attempts, my husband and I decided to find another
hospital which had a statistical track record of better outcomes. We
went to New York Presbyterian Hospital, Cornell University. This time,
IT WORKED!!!!!
I was finally pregnant! Hallelujah!
I
carried that pregnancy like someone carrying an egg with a spoon; very
delicately… although we were based in Nigeria, I refused to travel back
during that pregnancy. I followed every instruction and went for every
doctor visit. I was ready to be a healthy mom with a healthy baby.
On
July 3, 2007 after a long labour and eventual CS, I gave birth to the
most handsome baby boy. He had a full head of hair and to this day, I
can remember that feeling when they brought him to me and we looked at
each other, eye to eye. We quickly announced it to our family and to
anyone and everyone. Across the globe there were celebrations and
outbursts of thanksgiving! He was the first grandson born to the late
Archbishop Benson Idahosa!
The
doctors asked to monitor him overnight in the NICU because he was born
via CS. We were so excited to have him that we didn’t give it a second
thought. Early the next morning, the head nurse came to my hospital room
and asked us to rush to see him. She told us that he was having trouble
breathing and sustaining a blood pressure.
What happened next, one could never have prepared for.
We watched our miracle baby die.
Benson Idahosa III, lived for only 12 short hours.
The first time I held my miracle baby in my arms was when he was dead.
Throughout
the grieving process, we discovered that there was a grace upon our
lives that man can never give. We cried desperately; deep tears that I
never knew I was capable of crying. Simultaneously a faith unlike
anything that I ever experienced began to billow in our spirits. As dark
as that time was, our resolve had never been stronger. We knew that we
knew that we knew that we would have our children.
We buried our long-awaited son on July 9th.
During
the burial service, Bishop David Huskins prophesied over us saying,
“Within a year from today, God is going to give your family a cause to
rejoice.” At the time, I was reluctant to receive this prophecy, knowing
our arduous journey of infertility treatments.
We returned to Nigeria with empty arms but hearts full of hope and prophetic promises.
The
doctors in New York told us that we couldn’t attempt another IVF for a
year, so, we began to fit back into our life routine. We also began to
embark on a project that the Lord had birthed in our spirits during the
height of our pain; to open a hospital for women and children in
Nigeria. We were awakened to the fact that if this could happen to us in
America (where we had everything humanly available to attend to our
baby), how much more is it happening in Nigeria where many medical
facilities available are sub-standard, to say the least. The dream for
Big Ben’s Children’s Hospital (BBCH) was birthed.
By
November of 2007, I still had not gotten a period since the delivery of
my son in July. Figuring it would eventually come, I didn’t give it
much thought; however, one morning, on a whim, I decided to do a check. I
had drawers full of home pregnancy tests and I just decided to take
one. To my surprise, it read POSITIVE!
I was pregnant again, and this time, completely NATURALLY!
God had worked a miracle in our lives! We travelled back to America for medical care.
The
morning of July 9, 2008 (exactly one year after the burial of our first
son and the prophecy) I gave birth to a healthy, handsome baby boy! To
God be the glory!
Feb Jr. is our son’s name and he is alive and doing very well. He is in elementary school and excels in everything.
God answered our prayers and kept His promise toward our home!
When
Feb Jr. was 2, I started being concerned as to why I wasn’t getting
pregnant again. We wanted a sibling for our son. We went back to the
doctors for testing and they told us that we were worse off than before.
While they acknowledged the miraculous nature of Feb Jr.’s conception,
they told us, “Nobody wins the lottery twice.” I was convinced that we
should try another IVF, which I did. Sadly, it failed, just like all of
the others before it.
I returned to Nigeria and within two months, I got pregnant naturally! Naturally, I say, naturally!
On November 14, 2011, we gave birth to yet another son, Nathaniel Benson Idahosa.
“Nate” is a 4 year old already, and is an exceptional joy to have in our home.
While
still breastfeeding Nate, birth control was the furthest thing from my
mind. I assumed that I had natural birth control, only to discover that I
was PREGNANT!
AGAIN! Another natural conception to the Glory of God!
Judah Benson Idahosa was born on January 2, 2013 and is now a thriving 3 year old with the energy of 100 men!
God
has given us our heart’s desire. We are raising three boys, all
naturally conceived. Our marriage and love for each other has been
strengthened through the journey of infertility and infant loss.
God
is faithful to His Word! He will always do as He has promised in our
lives. He never fails His children. Though it may seem like it’s getting
worse and it may feel impossible, keep your eyes on Him with
expectation. He is the giver of life and never fails. Whether He does it
naturally or via medical intervention, He is the one that does the
miracle, and He will provide yours as well.
My
prayer for you is that you will follow the path that God has for you
and that your prayers will be answered as God has planned, in Jesus'
name!
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